The Hairy Bikers’ Brilliant Bakes

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Selling in excess of 6 million copies of their books, Si and Dave continue to entertain and inspire with their innovative publishing and heartwarming TV shows. Myers wants to return to work next year. “I’m hoping. Hand on my heart, I am. It’s going to take work and physiotherapy to get myself stronger,” he says. “But that’s going to be a hell of a day. That pizza down the pub is going to be quite special.” He was studying the pre-Raphaelites at the time, “fascinated by the decadent Victorians”, and craved a lavish cascade of hair, but “I had nothing! I couldn’t get a corkscrew curl to save my life!” he says. The alopecia did help to make his recent hair loss feel livable, though. “I just said to my wife: ‘Oh shit, get the clippers out. I’m done with this.’ It was harder for her to do, because she’d never seen me with no hair. But she did come out with a great line when my eyebrows went. She said: ‘Darling, you look like they pulled you out the mould before you’d finished.’” It’s easy to imagine the evening unspooling as they discovered their common ground – there is so much of it. Both were bullied as children: King for his weight, Myers for alopecia. Both came from families of “grafters” – King’s dad working on ships, Myers’ at the paper mill in Barrow-in-Furness. Both had much older siblings, and seriously ill parents: King was eight when his father died, while Myers’ mother was diagnosed with MS when he was seven. But, no, they say, they didn’t talk about any of this. That was the great thing about writing their 2015 autobiography, Blood, Sweat and Tyres, King says. “We found out quite a lot about each other.” With their unique blend of tasty recipes, cheeky humour and irresistible enthusiasm, the Hairy Bikers have become Britain's favourite food heroes.

To assemble the pie, press about a third of the cheese mixture over the base layer of pastry. Top with a layer of potatoes, then repeat with another layer of the cheese mixture. Add a second layer of potatoes, then top with the remaining cheese mixture. Press everything down quite firmly. Myers can relate. His daughter is in the process of buying a first flat and confronting the “possibility that the mortgage may double”. As a student, he used to sit in Karl Marx’s chair at the British Library – was that a statement of ideology? “No,” he says, “it was nothing political.” He just thought it was cool. When Myers began chemo, did King consider shaving his head in sympathy? ‘If he’d asked us, I probably would have’ First, make the pastry. Put the flour in a bowl with a good pinch of salt and add the butter and lard, if using. Rub the fat in until the mixture resembles fine breadcrumbs, then add all but a tablespoon of the egg. If using the Marmite, whisk it into the milk, then drizzle this into the pastry, mixing until you have a firm dough. Alternatively, just add enough milk to bind the pastry together, making sure it isn’t crumbly.What’s the point of mulling over the old shit that’s caused trouble?” Myers adds. “If we got together, are we going to sit there, and I’m going: ‘My mum had MS,’ and you, your dad with kidney failure? No, we’re going to go fishing and get drunk and have a good time. Together, we’ve brought each other quite a bit of happiness.” But they are wary of overthinking their relationship. Myers shares a story he once heard “about an old sage” who, appropriately enough, “had a big long beard. And somebody came to him and said: ‘Master, do you sleep with your beard under the sheets or over the sheets?’ And from that moment on the fella never had a good night’s sleep.” Si King hails from North East England and is a big, blond bearded biker with an infectious laugh. He worked for many years as an Assistant Director and Locations Manager for film and television, including the Harry Potter films. I would say the love. And I appreciate your warmth,” Myers says. “When we get together – there’s always the big man hugs. Sometimes, when he tries to kiss me on the lips, it gets a bit …” He purses his lips and wipes at them furiously. “But I was well grateful for it last week, so I’m not complaining. I think it’s the shared experiences that’s the best, because we do understand.”

To assemble, spread the pastry base with the mustard. Top with the sausage meat, pressing it down to compact it, then spread the apple mixture on top. Roll out the remaining pastry and use it to make a lid. Brush the edges with beaten egg and crimp them together. Brush the top of the pie with egg and cut a couple of vents in the centre to release steam. The recipes here are sensible. Nothing is too cheffy. These are goods that we can imagine ourselves making and enjoying. All the ingredients are readily available and nothing outrageously expensive, well, apart from the butter. From the ultimate veggie curries to the perfect crowd-pleasing tray bakes, satisfying soups, pastas and pies to a veggie twist on burgers, barbecues and a banging breakfast brunch, The Hairy Bikers' Veggie Feasts is bursting with meat-free delights you'll turn to time and time again, all made with ingredients that can be bought easily and won't cost the earth. Myers butts in. “My wife said the same thing. ‘I’ll shave mine out of support.’ I said: ‘Don’t do that because, then, you do realise, we can’t go out together?’ Not being sexist, but I think [baldness] is easier for a bloke.”

I usually avoid celebrity cookbooks, but The Hairy Bikers’ Brilliant Bakes is an all-round winner. A perfect Christmas gift, but buy two. You will want to keep one.

No, I’ve had enough,” he replies. “I thought I’d paid my dues when I was a kid with my mother. And I’ve got the hugest respect for my wife for putting up with me. I’m a … what’s the word? I get angry with myself, and I try to keep it to myself, but sometimes – you know, words spill over, which I feel guilty about. But no, I don’t think it helps you cope at all.” For the Hairy Bikers, nothing says love and home like the smell of a cake in the oven, a homemade loaf or a freshly baked pie.

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Dust your work surface with flour. Take two-thirds of the dough and roll it out to fill a 20cm round cake or pie tin. Put the pastry-lined tin and the remaining dough in the fridge to chill until ready to fill. Born and bred in Barrow-in-Furness, Dave Myers' versatile skills have taken him to some unusual places. He worked in a steelworks as a student, to finance his studies in Fine Arts, and later joined the BBC as a make-up artist, specialising in prosthetics.